I've realized I am addicted to my phone and I am not proud of it. As soon as I'm not doing anything I turn my phone on and mindlessly click to some form of social media: instagram, blogs, Facebook, email, or pinterest.
It's time for an intervention.
yesterday I deleted all the apps on my phone I constantly open. I deleted my email so I couldn't access it. Pretty much the only apps I open now are the Gospel Library app and my photos one. I did actually keep instagram on but in a less accessible spot and I only allow myself to check it in the evening once the kids are asleep.
Just today, I can't believe how many times I picked up my phone to "just quickly" check IG, Facebook, blogs etc. I'd read a text from someone, exit out of that app and immediately try to open IG. I want to be so much more present with my children. I want to have time to just ponder life and not always be entertained by something. Sure when I'm nursing I can't do much so I'd always flip through my phone. Now I sit there watching Max play more, thinking of activities I can do with him, what household chores need to be done, reflecting on the scriptures I had already read that day.
For me, my phone is so constantly accessible. It's not always in my pocket and it is often lost, but it does find its way into my hands more often than I'd like to admit and I'm sick of it, I'm sick of the addiction that I have encouraged.
I still get on these various forms of social media, but only on my computer, and let me tell you, as a mother of 3 children less than 2 years apart, finding time to physically open my computer is pretty much never found, literally it only gets opened at night and once the kids are in bed or maybe at nap time.
I don't think all these apps I love are a bad thing though, in many ways they are super awesome: connecting with friends that are good influences inspiring you to be better about x, y, or z, blog posts/pins about being a better wife, mother, friend, or homemaker. Facebook helps me plan events with friends and get advice on raising twins. I need these mediums of social media on my life, just less of it constantly throughout my day. Media can be a tool for good but I've let that "good" become to excessive and it's turned into evil I believe.
I want to be more overall present in MY life, not looking at my phone and interested in other people's lives continually. Of course I need breaks, but I've given myself too many. I want more time to just sit and think to listen to my thoughts, to be able to be quiet and still enough during me day to listen to the spirit, not reading about what someone ate for lunch or pictures of what my friends are doing all day long.
So, we'll see how this week goes. At the end of it I will re-evaluate, do I want those apps on my phone or even my life? Will I put them back on? Am I happier with myself? I will let you know.